The Road is Hard

Before I begin this post, I wanted to mention a couple of ‘admin’ type items. One is my new guestmap over there —–>

I know where a lot of my blog buddies hail from but if you’d care to stick a pin on the map, I’d be glad to see it. I’m sorry Minka, Joel was 1st but that doesn’t mean you’re not number 1 around here πŸ™‚

Second, I’m going to try to go to just making one new post a week, probably on Sunday. With the kids, school, sports, work, yard, dog and a whole list of goals I haven’t progressed on, I have to seek a new balance. It doesn’t take much time to drop in for a visit so I’ll still keep in touch with my regular buddies, I will just post less. Think of it this way, it will so much easier to keep up with things at the Hen House!

Ok, back to the Hard Road:

1) I’m working on my rollerblading and its coming along nicely but I guess I had to fall down eventually. I fell down twice today, both times during stopping. Stopping is difficult and dangerous. The road is really $%*#@$ Hard!!

Oh well, in fashion news, purple buttocks are all the rage this season!

Grant came with me the first time, because he is learning to blade too. What a good sport he was. He fell on his little butt about 20 times but just kept saying “I’m ok Mom” and carrying on. In typical little boy fashion, he did stop to watch the worms at one point and hollered out to me ‘ Look Mom, there is a worm digging into the pavement! ‘

In Alberta, even the worms are hardy!

2) I wanted to share with you a bit about a celebration I have taken part in in the last few weeks. My good friend M, who I have worked with for almost 20 years, retired on June 1. She is definitely happy with her decision and is looking forward to many years living as a ‘Happy, Wild, and Free‘ retiree. I’m glad that she has so much to look forward to.

Here is a picture of us, taken at her party (posted with permission):

mandl.jpg

I have so many great memories of the years working with M. Not only is she is highly respected chemist but she has always been very involved in the academic community and in promoting women in science. As a colleague she has been a great mentor and friend. The last few years at our company have had some significant challenges and its been good to share them with one such as M.

Some of the biggest influences from M have been in the area of personal support and friendship. She always looks out for people. M was responsible for introducing me to the fellow who I ended up car pooling with for several years and we became very good friends. He and his wife, even though they’ve moved to Michigan, still stay in touch and their children call my Auntie! Also, years ago, I had to go to a very important meeting in Houston and this was the first time I actually got to go to a work meeting with someone I knew. Luckily for me, M was going to the same meeting. Unfortunately, I had had a miscarriage a couple of weeks before that meeting and was still fairly ill. No tidy endings for me, I had to bleed and struggle for 2 months, but that’s another story. Anyway, M was so kind and supportive of me through that time, and it meant a lot to me that she was there as a friend and colleague. We had some pretty big battles to fight in those days and as an ally, she was superb.

Why am I including this under the ‘Hard Road’? Well, the thing that I find hard is not only coming to work and she is not there, but I have been feeling a lot of career angst lately and this change just underlines it all. I know that M is leaving our company to enjoy many busy years of activities and family time and I’m happy for her. I really wonder these days if I shouldn’t leave, but for slightly different reasons. I keep thinking ‘what is the point of retiring in 10-15 years when my kids are just about ready to leave home?

Maybe I should go now, focus more on the family, and start another career when I’m in my fifties. I’ve spent a lot of time developing a lot of skills. I don’t want to pack them away and never work again. In fact, I think, if I choose wisely, I can have another 20-30 years of doing something useful. But, I’ve also paid a pretty high price to get the family I have. I want to do the best possible job at helping them develop and grow so they too can move and be contributing, productive people. That is so hard to squeeze in now and it creates a lot of stress.

Years ago I took a set of courses called “The Excellence series”. It was basically about rising to your potential. One aspect of the mission of Context Associated, was to help people be more effective so they could ‘move forward, get great results, and contribute to the world’. I’ve learned a lot and done a lot but somehow have the feeling that I need to contribute a bit more.

So, this is the hard road I’m travelling right now. Trying to decide what signposts to follow, trying to tune my GPS so I don’t get lost! Of course, I haven’t mentioned anything about my husband, and he’s a big part of this but I don’t want to speak for him, but yeah, I’m driving him nuts too πŸ™‚

I would love it if any of my friends, family, lurkers, would care to share their thoughts on this issue. I know I’m not alone, and many people have career upheavals and change to deal with or to make happen.

Meanwhile, because the road I’ve been blading on really IS hard, and I’m using a whole lot of rusty muscles, I better go for a soak!

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77 Responses to The Road is Hard

  1. Weeeeeell,
    I am going to jump out on a limb, just cuz you asked, sis.
    It may not be a popular opinion in all quarters but I say, if you can, let the career wait. The kids won’t.
    I know you will find a way to work it all out, you’re smart like that.
    mwah!

  2. Oh, and
    FIRST!!
    And, what a precious gift you’ve had in M.
    Happy retirement to her.

  3. Monika says:

    Lovely post. I am wya to young to answer this quetsion. But I did sign myself in teh guestbook. I was number 3!!!

    I really do wnat a child. I am 28 turning 29. And I think i would love to be a stay at home mom if I could manage it financially.
    I think if you can and your husband agrees with it, and it is somehting you really oculd imagine doing…then stay at home with your kids. they do not wiat it is true. the quetsion is only, would it mak eyou happy, would it be full-filling enough for you?!
    Ah…what do I know!?
    But goo dluck with it and happy retirement to that extraordinary lady!

  4. Brian says:

    Good Monday morning,
    I am feeling fine this week after my panic attack last Friday, and no I am not going to delete my blog. I signed your guest map, had to be the bunny!

    If you can afford finacially not to work and to stay home, then the decision should be made as a family because it will affect all of you. Taking a career break could be good, if you want to change careers and go back years from now and start something new. Or, why not work from home. Jet Blue has it’s call center in the homes of Utah housewives who work part-time. Just a thought.

    Hunkering down waiting for Alberto, the track is right over our house on Tuesday. Will have a special report on Wednesday.

    Go Oilers, on a roll, one game!

  5. Cowgirl says:

    So glad you are getting the hang of roller bading. I used to blade a lot…

    As far as the whole job/life changes go…I am the last one that needs to be giving any advise. That being said, I think you already know what you want deep inside.

    I need those rising to one’s potential classes.

  6. Fred says:

    Congrats on the decision to post once a week. That’s the way I do it, too. It’s less stress from a creative and time management perspective.

    Career-wise, I can totally understand what you’re feeling. I walked away from the corporate world in 2002 to spend time with my family and to give them roots. It’s the best thing I ever did.

    Great picture, too!

  7. frangelita says:

    Toss a coin and tell yourself that you will go with what it decides. How you feel about your “decision” will tell you how you really feel about it.

    You look lovely in the pic, btw

  8. shiftclick says:

    Does your company have Family Leave? Or just a Sabbatical policy? Maybe you could go away for a year and return?

    I’m rather going along with what others have said – if you can do it financially, be a stay-at-home mom; or – take a part-time job doing something you find fun and non-brain-engaged just to keep some $ coming in but that gives you more time with the family …

  9. Jenna Howard says:

    If I had kids and a slave husband, I’d be a stay at home mom. My sister-in-law made the decision last fall when her mat was up and I know she can’t see anyone else spending this much time with my nephew. Plus…I hate this sticking satisfying job of mine and wouldn’t miss it at all.

  10. Barngoddess says:

    co-workers who turn into friends like M. are rare gifts to be treasured. Congrats on her retirement!

    The end of 2002, I quit working outside of my home. Ive always had a good, well paying job but my oldest son (was an only child at that time!) was literally growing up at the speed of light and I was missing out. I missed plays, sports games, awards ceremonies,field trips,class parties,bed-time stories, scraped knees, lost teeth, ect. In the middle of his 3rd grade year, I decided the almighty dollar was not worth it at the expense of missing my child grow up. We do not get a second chance. I did some major soul searching, debated with myself, friends, husband (who has supported my decision 100% in his attitude and his bankroll!) It was one of the most scariest things I did in my life, leave a good job, good pay, good benefits, upward moving career, to become a stay at home mom. I took on a few ‘problem’ horses to train, then a few more and before I knew it, I was making almost as much money from home…….

    that was not only the hardest decision I ever made (besides having another child after our first one was ten!) it was the BEST decision I ever made.

  11. cj says:

    πŸ™‚ I am the only Minnesotan on the map! Go me!
    Way to go on the Roller blading. I am pondering digging mine out. I used to do a lot of that back in the day. I found it to be a great way to meet men. πŸ™‚

  12. Whinger says:

    Sad you won’t post as often, but completely understood.

    As for temporary retirement, maybe you could go part-time?

  13. neva says:

    before i write another word:

    HOW CUTE ARE YOU??!! damn… that’s a great picture!! thanks for adding it to this post! (always nice to put a face–especially one as lovely as yours–with the wonderful energy/writing you’ve been sharing with us!) 😎

    somehow, i’m sure M is going to miss you every bit as much as you’ll miss her!

    as for the “weekly” post plan? i’m for it! i think anything that allows you to more easily balance your schedule is an excellent idea. takes the pressure off of figuring out *what* to write, too! i’m pretty much down to a couple of posts a week–along with the “dalai bobo”/quotes i do on sundays… works for me!

    harmony is a very good thing, and the best way to have it in your life is to pay attention to how you’re feeling. you’ve got some great suggestions (regarding your thoughts about quitting your job) here… i’ll toss out one more, in hopes of giving you another option worthy of consideration. freelance. for years, that’s how i managed to have my professional cake and eat it, too. i would pitch and take on projects as they appealed to me, so i could set my own schedule. i don’t know if this would work in your field, but with a little creative thinking i’m betting you might come up with something!

    on a personal/girlfriend note: i so enjoyed speaking with you, yesterday… and hope we’ll get to do a lot more of that in the future! who knows? maybe if we put our heads together, we might come up with a good project that will help justify the change you crave! hope you have a lovely week… i’m quite certain we’ll be “chatting” here, there, and a few other places over the next few days! πŸ˜€

  14. Margaret says:

    If you can,do part-time or stay at home.Kids have the bad habit of growing fast and furious.From tiny babes to school kids already,soon they will be grown and gone. They is always time for the job,but kids wait for no one.I didn’t have the choice and missed alot .
    Try it for a year especially if your company will give leave of abscense.
    I know you will make a good decision because you think long and hard about things and are very intouch with your feeling and understand much about your needs and those of your family. Love to you Mgt

  15. Margaret says:

    Good on with the skating

  16. Brian says:

    Thanks for the support, CFS does a number on my head sometimes. My special guest blogger coming up this week talked me off the ledge this past weekend. Sure like to be more stable. Thanks again, your words bring me great comfort.

  17. FirstNations says:

    i am a family first person. thats my stand. if money is not an issue, choose family. thats what i did and i have never regretted it for a moment.

  18. weirsdo says:

    I was raised in the 70s to put my career first, but I didn’t do so well when my mom did and moved two states away. When I had my daughter, I just wanted to be with her, and I realized I didn’t care about literary scholarship the way my husband does at all. I homeschool my children, and they are smart and generally well-behaved. My daughter makes so much money as a musician that she pays her own cell phone bill and we never have to give her an allowance. Her camp is also cheap because she got a scholarship. I am very grateful I will never regret not having spent enough time with my kids, and, it appears, will not have to ask, “What went wrong?” It is also good that I can work part time, though, since I would go crazy if that were my WHOLE life.

  19. Miz BoheMia says:

    It sounds to me like you already know what you want…. and everyone before me put it so eloquently already soooo… what is there for me to say! Dios Mio!

    I echo Neva… very beautifully put!

    My main rule for myself has been this… to always listen to my heart, to my gut and only then will I end up fine. As long as you do that, you will be on the path meant for you… we may make mistakes along the way but as long as they are ours, we own them and learn from them, then great… and it sounds to me like you are one wise Mama Hen!

    Here’s to a peaceful resolution to the temporary unsettling of the soul and may your answers reach you soon!

    Much love to you sweet Laura!

    Me…

  20. Kyahgirl says:

    Logo-yay, you’re first. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and thanks for the mail today. Its good to know that we all have ‘issues’ to deal with πŸ™‚

    Monika-never hesitate to give your opinion, I value it! I’ll make sure my friend see your good wishes.

    Brian-please take care, I worry about all my friends who live in the hurricane zone. Go OIlers go!!!

    Cowgirl-we can go blading together someday πŸ™‚ Any time you want to talk about your potential, drop me aline. YOu’re just full o’ potential buddy!

    Fred-I was hoping to hear from you since I know you’ve done a mid-life career shift too. Thanks.

    Frangelita-good advice, thanks πŸ™‚

    shiftclick-actually, I can check into our ‘leave’ policy.

    Jenna-I see you working hard on getting yourself a slave over at Doug’s place πŸ™‚ Sounds like you need to look for a different job my friend!

    Barngoddess-thanks for sharing your thoughts. I appreciate hearing another angle.

    cj-Welcome! LOL! Yes, pull out the rollerblades πŸ™‚ I never really considered the meeting men angle, even though that’s not something I’m looking to do. I have met some nice worms and had a few close encounters with some pavement though.

    whinger-don’t worry, you’ll never get rid of me all together!

  21. Kyahgirl says:

    Neva- *blush* thanks for the kind words. I think that’s a great picture of both of us and one I’ll keep in my album.

    I am interested in this idea you mention. Barngoddess alluded to it to…if you follow your heart and interests, sometimes amazing opportunities can present themselves yes?

    Margaret-I Know you regret the time you missed. Love you too girl!

    Brian-I meant every word. We blogging buddies have to stick together.

    First Nations-I can tell you’re a family person and its been a good thing. Thanks for the thoughts and the hilarious comment you put on my guest map. You’re an original!

    Weirdo-I didn’t know that about you. thanks for sharing. You and your daughter are incredibly creative and obviously well educated. It shows!

    Miz B-thank you. Much love to you too!

  22. Squaregirl says:

    I used to blade…you’d know when I went because of all the scrapes and bruises.

    Two of my sisters recently went through this. One quit her job when she had her second girl and another went to teaching half time. Neither thought they’d be stay home moms, but they can’t imagine doing anything differently now that their little ones are grown. As far as careers go, I always believe in the importance of doing something you love and truly brings joy…as Joseph Campbell says: “Follow Your Bliss!”

  23. funny thing says:

    I too have had some interesting pavement experiences.
    You’re right, it hurts!
    Ah well….

  24. Brian says:

    Morning,

    Thanks for the e-mail, we came through fine so far, just rain(not enough), no wind, no tornados. Have a sunrise this morning, although Alberto hasn’t yet made landfall to the northwest. Special report tomorrow,
    “Oh! Alberto!”, be careful where you read it, has a “snort” factor of 10! Chance of storms all day today as it pulls by.

    Well, the Oilers are on the brink, but the USA soccer, pathetic performance.

  25. H.A. Page says:

    It is fun seeing what you look like!!!! Good luck on your continued rollerblading…
    Cheers

  26. kyahgirl says:

    Squaregirl-thanks for the insights. keep on bladin’ πŸ™‚

    Brian-glad things are going ok with the weather, sort of. I’m not following soccer but catch a few hints from you and Monika πŸ™‚

    ft-that was a hilarious story, if you can forgive me for laughing at your expense πŸ™‚ Do you find the unicycle any easier?

    Hi H-thanks. I like looking at other bloggers too. πŸ™‚

  27. Arabella says:

    Bear in mind that I have no experience of these matters!:
    Eating cake and having it has always sounded rather a good idea to me, so if you can work without pay at raising your children, indeed, why not do it ‘full-time’?
    What’s the point of having the little critters if you miss them?

    I’d have to be sedated and pulled on a rope in order to roller-blade. I admire you, yer mad bugger!

  28. kyahgirl says:

    Arabella- you made me laugh. Such sound advice in two areas of my life πŸ™‚

  29. Jac says:

    What a cute pic!

    I’ll miss the entries, but I guess I’ll just have to satisfy myself with one a week. Good for you for knowing your limits. πŸ™‚

    Also, more pics of the dog please.

  30. kyahgirl says:

    Jac-thanks. Casper is delighted that you want to see more of him. I’m preparing a page just for him but its not done yet. πŸ™‚

  31. Barbara says:

    I know that you will thoroughly analyze any career decision that you make. However, I do have to ask if perhaps your desire to spend more time with your children is a disguise for something else that is going on in your work life. If your company makes allowances for sabbaticals or a leave of absence, why not take it and use the time to explore other careers that blend your love of people and the internet/computers and science. I could see you as an on-line coach who focused her coaching services toward women working in science-related career areas. (You have so many amazing skills, insights and knowledge to offer others!) If you are interested in coaching as a possible career, I know that Royal Roads University in Victoria offers online coaching courses that are highly regarded.
    Whatever you decide, I will support you any way I can!

  32. frankengirl says:

    Hey, kyahgirl – lovely post, lovely YOU and tough decision! I don’t have to face this one yet, but just remember that nothing is set in stone. You can always change your mind and change it again – πŸ™‚ And if we don’t take risks, we’re often left wondering…

  33. Kyahgirl says:

    Barbara-as always, you are wise and a true friend ♥

    frankengirl-you’re right about risk taking too and change. I expect to be changing careers maybe 2 or 3 more times πŸ™‚

  34. g says:

    Hey Kyah – Just catching up on the goings-on while I was away, although I had my laptop with me, opportunity didn’t present itself. Anyway, it was nice to see you in person – such a beauty inside and out. It’s a tough decision you face, I know. I work quasi full time which means I work about 90%, thinking about scaling back to 80%. If I could, I think I would be home altogether and that is my plight, having it not be a possibility. Two of the worst days in my life were my return to work from both maternity leaves, with my breast pump in tow. The only solace is that I have a good deal of flexibility in my job so as such, I will not miss a recital, a picnic, a last day, a first day, etc. Although, I am not sure if I would go crazy being home full time, it’s nice to be able to exercise that option. Go with your heart, it never lies. G

  35. Meow says:

    Hey there, just dropping by to say HI. Hope all is well, and that you are having a great week. Take care, Meow

  36. Neil Crespi says:

    Just dropping by to say that your blog is nice. Casper is cute too. I think you are such a very cool mom. Your kids are so lucky. Have a great day.

  37. shayna says:

    Gosh… I would probably break my arm, leg, nose, etc… if I dared to rollerblade… I’m just not that talented…

    I too am looking into a new career path… I use to stay at home with my son… then went back to work when he turned 1 yr… I am really regreting it!

    Good Luck on your decision…

  38. Brian says:

    Somebodsies just went crazy with comments. Hum!!!! I wonder who that could have been? I guess I will have to keep looked. SMACK! What was that?

  39. Doug says:

    A nod to M, a friend to my friend.

  40. Jamie Dawn says:

    How wonderful that your friend is retiring. My dad will be retiring by this year’s end. I think it is a great reward when people get to retire while they are still vibrant and healthy. I wish her many years of happy freeeedom!!
    You are wrestling with an important issue. If it were me in your shoes, I would put my family first, and look into starting a career that would allow me flexibility and more time with my kids and hubby. I know this is a big decision for you. You will make the right choice after you think it over some more.
    I wish you success in all you do!
    Roller blading is great exercise!

  41. Brian says:

    Would you like me to delete the comments and return your lurkerhood?

  42. kyahgirl says:

    g- Hi πŸ™‚ Thanks for sharing some of your history. Its nice to know more about you.

    Meow: *waves* hi, its nice to see you.

    Neil-thanks for your kind words and for the visit. I am just so curious how you found my site! πŸ™‚

    shayna-thanks buddy. I know its tough. Hang in there.

    Brian-that sounded just like someone getting a spanking!

    Doug-I’m sure my friend will see your nod and send you one in return. πŸ™‚ She’s a bit shy.

    Jamie Dawn-thanks for your insights. I’ll keep you posted πŸ™‚

    Brian-that’s ok, it was just in fun.

  43. garfer says:

    Tune in, turn on, drop out, and buy a campervan. All this achieving ones own potential stuff is over rated if ask you me. I realised I wasn’t going to achieve mine after ten minutes of trying really hard. I’m settling for mediocrity and lots of beer.

    Can you hook up a GPS to a pair of roller blades? It might help.

  44. kyahgirl says:

    garfer-well, I could just slip the GPS into my pocket. πŸ™‚

  45. Brian says:

    Ok. You know how paranoid I get.*looks furtively around*

  46. Brian says:

    Ok. You know how paranoid I get.*looks furtively around*

    That sounds like a Zen koan.

    What is the sound of a lurker’s spanking.

  47. One post a week?

    Tut, tut.

  48. actonbell says:

    First off, good luck with the rollerblades!

    You’ve expressed on of the most important dilemmas beautifully. It’s terrible that people have to choose between raising their families and having careers. As has already been stated, your decision won’t be set in stone, and it sounds like you know what you want and what your priorities are. It’s true that children grow up in a flash! (My sister’s girls are turning 16!!! How is this possible?)
    I wish you serenity and happiness with your decision:)

  49. Kyahgirl says:

    Brian-no idea what Zen koan is πŸ™‚

    P&T- tut tut? hmph. didn’t know you even read my blog! Don’t worry, you’ll adapt πŸ™‚

    actonbell-the rollerblading is coming along but I’m thinking I need some more padding on the backside πŸ™‚
    Thanks for the well wishes. Maybe we can get it sorted out in the next 6 months or so.

  50. Its quite a culture shock going from working and being around adults to hanging out with kids all day.

    I remember when my wife made the transition. It was difficult for her to go from running a company to changing diapers…that was 12 years ago. Either way its tough, you work and you make life better economically, you stay home you enrich your kids. Either way its tough.

    The part that is important is sticking with your decision. Make the comitment and follow it through. I keep thinking of it in terms of, I have my oldest for basically 6 more years my youngest for 10, the grow up fast

  51. and I almost forgot, purpule buttocks are the fashion rage!?!? who knew. glad you are enjoying blading though

  52. Brian says:

    A Zen koan is a meditation puzzle, the most famous one is “What is the sound of one hand clapping”, the answers don’t really exist.

    So for you, a Zen koan would be “What is the color of rollerblading” See?

  53. IDV says:

    Sorry I’m late! This less prolific posting thing seems to be taking off! Except in my case it’s out of pure laziness (and a little bit of ‘Never Have Time’).

    As for the work/kids quandry: Ummmm… Kids? I know, I’m useless!

    Actually, I think you should take time away from work and kids to practice rollerblading πŸ˜‰

  54. SID says:

    I had a GPS but lost it.

    I will never retire, I love my job plus I can’t afford to.

    Lovely pic!

  55. cube says:

    Funny, my great aunt-in-law, also a very vital woman, recently retired. We went to a big party and everything. Guess what? She ended up being retired for 5 days! Now she’s got a new job that she is looking forward to & will enjoy. Go figure.

  56. karma says:

    a great mom, and a great friend too! how lovely you are, Laura!

  57. The Phoenix says:

    I know from what I’ve read so far that you have had to go through a whole lot to have the family you have today. It’s a lot of work juggling career and family, but it’s a labor of love, isn’t it?

    Great picture of you and your now ex-co-worker.

  58. Kyahgirl says:

    Village Idiot-thanks for those insights. And yes, I agree, they are only yours for a short while then you have to let them go.
    And yes, I’m sure with your accident prone tendencies you’ve probably been in fashion in the purple butt deparment too πŸ™‚

    Brian-thanks for the explanation. Rollerblading is green.

    IDV-its always nice to see you here. I wish sometimes I could do as you suggest.

    SID-thanks. You have a hard job-I have no idea how you do it. You’re an amazing person.

    Cube-that made me laugh out loud. Some people just aren’t meant to retire!

    Karma-thank you, for all the nice things you said!

    Phoenix-yeah, its a struggle to juggle but I’ll get it figured.

  59. Barb says:

    Hey there Kyah, I added my pin to the map.

    I think you only get one chance to spend time with your kids while they are young but will have many opportunities for work. That is my thoughts anyway.

  60. David Amulet says:

    I agree–balance is the key. I have varied between three or four posts a week to barely one, depending on the ebbs and flows of “real life.” So do what you can, but keep it all in persepctive!

    — david

  61. You are smart in doing the one post per week. I used to struggle to keep up posting, but found that I was stressing way too much over a blog that I keep just to have fun. So now I post when I can – hopefully, a couple of times a week.

    On the rollerblading, you go girl! Purple butts are cool.

    On the career change – my story: I changed careers in my 40’s – went back to school for several years while working full time. I finally completed another college degree, sat for, and passed (after 3 tries) the CPA exam, and at 53, I’m happily ensconced on my new career. And I’m over halfway to having my student loans paid off!(don’t know about that being a good thing – I would prefer -$0- debt). It’s fun to change careers, especially when you have some skills that you can already use – maybe open your own business out of your home. I don’t know what it is that you do, but I have a feeling tht it’s something creative and cool and that you are the kind of person who will be successful at whatever it is that you choose to do.

    So! Good luck to you! And thanks for finding us. Baxter and Casper and definitely twins! How fun!

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  63. Terry says:

    Love your happy face picture – Covet your map… very nice.

    I tried once to learn how to skateboard: unfortunately it was a recently tarred and graveled road. It looked okay at the time, but I hit a stray pebble, the skateboard stopped cold, and then my upper back thigh made hard contact with the road… the purple, green, blue, black… all the usual colors stuck around for a month! That was my first and last attempt at small things with wheels πŸ™‚

  64. IDV says:

    63 comments? Don’t you think that’s a tad greedy?

    Oh, to be as popular as you… πŸ™‚

  65. Katie says:

    I marked the map! But it’s not showing up – maybe there’s some sort of delay for the info to load? It’s so interesting to see the spread of readers, L. How cool.

  66. Geez-a-lou, 65 comments. You don’t need my two cents – besides what to I know? I’ve found that I must be passionate about my pursuits or things just don’t work out. I’ll go checkout that map now.

  67. Kyahgirl says:

    Hi Barb! Thanks for the advice. I’m getting a clear message from my readers πŸ™‚ and thanks for sticking your pin. Alberta is just teeming with people!

    David-Welcome, I think this is the first time I’ve seen you here. Yeah, its easy to put ‘blogging pressure’ onto yourself with everything else.

    Hi Schnoodlepooh-I’m glad I found you and your menagerie too. I like your style. I think I could seriously enjoy starting a new career in my late 50s. Maybe law, or something that I won’t feel obligated to quit at the standard retirement age.

    Femmes Fatale-Thanks for the shoutout to your readers. I’m honoured. I will come back and check out your links. Your blog looks interesting.

    Terry-thanks πŸ™‚ Loved the skateboarding story. If you go way up the comments to ‘funny thing’ she gives a link to her own skateboarding story which is hilarious.

    IDV-oh no, not greedy! I just left a post up long enough for everyone to get round to it. You are very popular with me young man and don’t you forget it!

    Katie-hi. I’ll go check the map. You Pacific Northwest people are all lumped on top of each other. YOu might have to zoom it to see.

    Mike-Of course I need your two cents. Thanks for giving them. Yes, passion is a key ingredient in most successful endeavours eh? πŸ™‚

  68. tanlucypez says:

    I sometimes worked part-time while my kids were little. Went to work full time at about age 40, and got a whole career in and a good retirement. But I had my kids while I was very young, so my oldest was in college when I went to work for real. I recommend part-time work if you can find it. It’s the best of both worlds.

    I don’t regret any of the time I spent being a stay-at-home mom. I DO regret some of the work-time away from them.

  69. Mama says:

    First I was a stay at home Mom, then I went to work. I thought that as my kids got older and demonstrated their need for independence, it was time for me to strike out and start a career. One thing that I found out was that as teens they really wanted me to be around anyway, and that making the choices that I made bothered them at the time. Nothing irreperable, however, was what I next discovered…My suggestion? Follow your heart. Be compassionate as your demo to them, with them and the world around you, as an example of a woman capable of unconditionally loving all sensient beings. This example worked for me, and I observe my children to be outstanding parents, each in their own style. Sounds to me like you’ve made some great starts already. MamaE

  70. Kyahgirl says:

    TLP-We’re almost exact opposite! I’ve had a career for 20 years and had my kids at 40. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

    Mama e- Good advice. You know, I do like working and can see myself making a successful career of many things so maybe I need to stop fretting about it πŸ™‚

  71. Katie says:

    I am trying to pin again with IE instead of Firefox, but I think it failed again. I think my firewall won’t let me, or something? Let’s just pretend I am there waving hullo along the Oregon/Washington border: I am invisi-girl! I exist, but no one can see me! Who knew I had a cartographical superpower?

  72. Katie says:

    Oh, shoot. Nevermind. I AM showing up, after a couple refreshes and a delay. I am not invisi-girl after all. Now I’m disappointed just a little. *sniff* I will have to find a new superpower.

  73. cooper says:

    I certainly canÒ€ℒt give advice on this and wonÒ€ℒt even try.
    I know kids who wished their parents would work and have a career and kids who wished their parents were home more. I canÒ€ℒt see making kids your life personally because then when they leave you have no life. I donÒ€ℒt think except for severe neglect it matters either way.

    But IÒ€ℒm hardly in a position to give advice.

    My mother always worked in some way but as we moved several times when I was younger and lived in Australia for a few stints she was around but she painted in a studio and taught and eventually when we settled in the US she started a business. I think she or my father were at most things we did, certainly not all and it really didnÒ€ℒt matter they were there for the important stuff.

  74. mig bardsley says:

    I’m a bit late on this one but for what it’s worth, I think you should do what feels best for you yourself. It’s not an irrevocable decision anyway. I’m sure you’re a very qualified and experienced person and could go back to work if you stopped now and found you weren’t happy.
    Just one thing though..if you decide to stay at home, don’t let the little darlings swallow your life whole….keep some for yourself. You’ll need it later πŸ™‚
    Good luck.
    what a lovely picture of you and your friend.

  75. VIBEE says:

    Hi,
    This is my first post and I just stumbled across your website when I was looking for another website. I was aprehended by your sharing here, and want to add my little bit of wisdom. I am a grand ma, (in Australia) and have lived long enough to know that direction comes in signs, and lack of joy often. I have noticed when it’s time to leave something/someone/somewhere, then it co-incides with JOY lifting off me about being there, being with them/him/her etc. I think you get my point. In leaving/changing work or circumstances follow after the JOY in your own heart. Money and things are replaceable, moments that are precious memories aren’t, and GOD doesn’t want us to miss out on what matters. Be where you feel at your best. be happy and thanks for your open hearted website,

  76. Sexy says:

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  77. Sudoku says:

    Buon luogo piacevole senza qualsiasi cosa dispari, ben progettata!

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